I’m guilty of not looking at the calendar on the weekends unless I have something planned. When I got to work this morning I flipped my calendar past the weekend and landed on today’s date. July 28.
I missed the 5th anniversary of my mom’s death yesterday. It’s morbid, yes, but I like to light a candle and remember that day. Not because I like the pain, but because it brings things into perspective. Life is short. Death is permanent. No matter how much time passes you never stop hurting or missing special people. It’s so important to live life and create our own happiness.
January 2003
Mother, I Don’t Mind The Pain
by Saundra L. Washington
When you died my dearest, blessed mother,
I had no sights or thoughts for tomorrow.
My soul experienced a wrenching eruption
Of pain and grief and excruciating sorrow.
The anguish of spirit: so unbearable;
The agony of mind: so intense,
The suffering in body: so unceasing,
Against all: I had no defense.
Nevertheless, beloved, I need you to know,
And I pray you can hear what I say.
I don’t mind the pain I’m going through.
It’s a small price, for our love, to pay.
We knew that one day we would have to part;
That death would come by in due time.
Birthday at the cottage
We knew how hard it would be for the other,
Who had to courageously linger behind.
But we knew our bond was worth the cost,
And valued each moment together we shared.
Now that I must without you go on,
The pain of my loss I will not be spared.
I wouldn’t, if I could, give my pain away.
It’s special and mine all alone.
It affirms all the love that I felt for you,
And in me, it can only be known.
So mother, though the pain of grief I endure
Will gradually and slowly subside.
The strength of the love that you and I share,
In the core of my heart will forever abide.
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I so agree; remembering the love is worth the pain of remembering; We feel the same way about our father.
{{{hugs}}}
this is lovely. and i agree it’s not morbid but simply loving to remember those we’ve lost. *hugs*
Can I just give you a hug?
thank you so much for all your kind words and hugs!
[...] going to start loving what is. I really needed to have things put in perspective. With my previous post and this I think I’m on the right [...]
{{{{{{{{HUGS}}}}}}}}}} Gawd, this made me cry. {{{{{{{{{{{{MORE HUGS}}}}}}}}}}}}}}
Yup, yup, yup. It was a few years ago that I recognized it was the 20th anniversary of my brother’s passing… it puts a different cast to the whole day and you never really heal completely.
i think that lighting a candle is the pefect wy to pay tribute to the love and memory that you have for your mother.
im so sorry for your loss. i know it’s been five years, but i cannot imagine that makes this anniversary any easier for you.
aw I didn’t realize the date either
and no not morbid at all, silly!
I’ve been thinking about her a lot lately, did I tell you I found a bracelet she gave me deep inside my jewelry box? I never wear bracelets but when I found it I put it on and have been wearing it almost every day! I do miss her…but it makes me happy to wear it.
LYLAS!!!
This is beautifully written. A lovely tribute to your mother. I don’t think it’s morbid at all… Beautiful… so sorry for your loss…